Don’t project…

April 7, 2020
We are all different. Some of us are handling everything in stride, like everything will be ok. Some of us are afraid that the world is ending. Both are right. It’s important not to judge or project our own feelings into others.

For the calm optimists, the fatalist mindset seems irrational. “Control what you can control”. For the obsessive skeptics among us, the optimism seems naive. Instead of using our own viewpoint to change others’ nature, try putting yourself in their shoes.

Logic driven people aren’t heartless, they just aren’t driven by emotion as much as the more empathetic among us. They are the problem solvers. Emotional driven people aren’t hysterical, they just tend towards feeling what others feel. The pain of the world is also their pain. They are the ones who keep us connected.

We need both the logical problem solvers and the emotional connectors to get us through this, lest we become a society of individually isolated robots or emotionally paralyzed by fear and worry. So let your problem solvers solve, that’s what gives them purpose. And the time will come soon when the problem solvers will step back to let the emotional among us lead us to healing. We all have a part to play.

For the more emotional driven, what enviable traits do your optimistic counterparts have? Maybe they focus more on the moment and less on the future? On the other side, what traits could more logic driven people develop? Greater compassion for those who feel deeply. Can you imagine being someone who suffers from OCD and were told their fear of disease or germs was silly and unfounded? And has now seen their fears materialize? How would you “accept” this new reality when your fears were unheeded and mocked?

This is trauma in real time. We will not come out unscathed. People will get sick. People will die. And people will suffer long term emotional damage. So instead of trying to change the nature of those around you, let them be and urge them to use those gifts to help. Let’s use our logic and emotion to build a middle path that we can all walk along towards a better way.

Author

Jeb Johnston

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