What if you stopped viewing undesired behaviors as “bad” & rather looked at the benefits they’ve given you? How have your coping mechanisms protected you in the past? Can you let them go?
A central focus of my practice is viewing our behaviors outside of the lens of Western morality and instead looking to understand where they benefit us.
Even undesired behaviors have a reason to exist. As humans, we don’t engage in behaviors without motivations. So when we have struggles with food or drugs or alcohol or relationships, we look to understand those parts of us rather than condemn them.
When we engage in “self-sabotage” we are simply recreating a protective measure that once served us. As we grow and develop skills, we no longer need these protective parts. Yet they are engrained. So we try to suppress or ignore or shame them away, which only makes them stronger.
What if you instead recognized their value and released them from their old responsibilities? What if you allowed space for that perfectionism or self-criticism to engage in tasks that you desire rather than protect you where you are perfectly capable of protecting yourself?
What could you accomplish if you stopped making enemies of all these parts of you and instead looked at yourself with the same empathy you have for others? Would things be different?
