There is plenty of advice out there for social distancing. Efficiency hacks, cocktail hours, dealing with depression from solitude, at home workouts. Not that any of these things will actually make isolation easier, but it seems all of our attention is based upon that. What about the difficulties of crowding?
Many of us are experiencing the stress of being in constant, close quarters with our families. This is especially evident here in NYC. My wife and I work, eat, and live in 500 sq ft. It can become crowded real quick. Especially with our 80 lb Bigsby taking up the whole couch!
I work with people who have their SO, their kids, kids home from college, maybe a niece of nephew. All with their own normal. All with their own schedules. It can be maddening!
For some of us the simplest start to moving into a sense of structure will be to set our schedule with all of these new roommates in mind. The old way just might not cut it. If you’re used to reading or meditating every morning at 7am but now you have your 20 year old son wandering in and making an elaborate smoothie in your Vitamix and listening to Drake on his iPhone speakers ya not likely that you’re gonna be feeling super zen. That’s ok. Figure out what works for you and practice some acceptance that our ideal structure may not be a reality.
The other difficulty is the competing personalities. Each of us deals with trauma in a different way. And make no mistake, we are experiencing a collective trauma right now. Practice compassion when a loved one expresses emotion that seems foreign to you. Their experience is just as valid as yours. Try to understand their perspective even if you don’t understand their feelings.
The stress of crowding can be trying and difficult. Find your solace, find your stolen moments of peace, and embrace them. They are more important now than ever. And even though it might not seem like it now, one day we will look back in fondness on the opportunity to spend real quality time with the ones we love. Don’t be so eager to wish it away.
