When it comes to behaviors around food: Fear> Control> Restriction> Disordered Eating This is why “diets don’t work”. It’s not the diet, it’s the intent. If you want a different result work on the fear & desire for control rather than jumping straight to restriction
There’s nothing right or wrong with wanting to lose weight, despite the dichotomy that both sides of the debate would have you believe. It’s a personal choice that I support for anyone whatever they decide. However, the methodology with which one approaches dieting can definitely be problematic depending upon their reasoning behind weight loss.
Those who struggle most with weight loss will often gravitate to the most restrictive forms of dieting. Even within the “flexible dieting” framework they will apply strict rules, excessive caloric restriction, an obsession with numbers and an orthorexic approach to food choice.
Why? Simple, a fear of outcome leads to attempts at control. Control is simply a false sense in a world where we have none. But when we feel helpless in the world around us we feel that exerting a stranglehold around what we eat can restore order.
The irony of this attempt at control is that it often leads to (what feels like) a lack of control instead. Binge episodes, emotional eating, food focus and feelings of guilt & shame are all frequent outcomes. So ppl feel even more out of control. (I’m reality, these behaviors are just further attempts at control from different places)
If you’re a chronic dieter who’s fought and fought with yourself and not seen the “results” you want, it might help to change your focus. Work on the emotions that are driving your desire for control. Identify them. Work to understand how those parts have helped you to survive in a chaotic world. And then ask them to take a break.
As the fear subsides, so should the compulsion for control (which manifests as restriction/rigidity). And with that you can start to work on the behaviors that actually drive struggles with weight rather than just blaming yourself and your lack of discipline.
Or you can try to hate yourself thin. Again. And again. And again.
